Whether you are coming “home” or this will be your first time in New Zealand, making a transition can sometimes be difficult. Perhaps you are a person who enjoys change and you are looking forward to a new situation, or returning to the old one. Maybe you are a person who groans at the thought of 'settling in' and having to make new friends. Either way, you're bound to feel a little 'out of it' in the beginning...AND THAT IS NORMAL!
Here are some tips just to help you know what to expect and also some suggestions for dealing with those days when you wonder, "What am I doing here anyway?"
You're changing. If you have enjoyed where you’re living, you will bring some of that along with you as part of you. You look at things a little differently. You may find yourself six months ahead in fashion and six months behind in music. Give yourself time to adjust. It will come.
Say goodbye to those you are close to and connect on various platforms. People who have not had your experience won't understand it and may not want to hear about it. Saying goodbye also helps you disconnect on that end and may, therefore, make it easier to connect here in your new place. Saying farewell is important!
Take care of unfinished business before you leave. Make a list of things you need to do. Such lists might include returning a toy or piece of clothing, returning a borrowed book, or sending that email that you promised to a friend. On another level, a “Things To Do” plan might include resolving a problem with a teacher or classmate, apologising for hurting someone's feelings, or saying thank you to someone who was helpful in the past. Tying up these loose ends in your life is sort of like cleaning out a locker or desk before moving on to a new grade.
Take time to reflect about leaving. What things have you enjoyed and what aspects do you want to take with you? What has been difficult? How do you feel about leaving - sad, happy, mixed? Take time to sort out some of those feelings with someone you trust and who listens well.
Take time to examine your expectations of New Zealand. Is it a place you consider “home” or brand new? Are you expecting things to be the same? Completely different? Is there a new language? New culture? What have you learned in past moves to make this move easier? What special things could you be sure to bring with you that help you feel “at home?” Is it a place that has been familiar in the past? Beware — it may no longer be the same place.
Take time to balance. Be neither too positive ("this will be a breeze") nor too negative ("I'll never feel at home here"), because it drains your energy. Try to be open to a new adventure and experience. Assume that good things await and that stressful feelings will pass in time. Make sure you take time to relax and do things that you enjoy - it's important to leave plenty of time for this!
Take time to talk to your family. They've shared your experiences and this can be a natural time to draw closer together. Chances are that they will share a lot of your feelings. Also, you need some support to help you manage - we all do. Your family is a great place to start. Realise that your parents have their own feelings about the move. Listen as well as talk.